With Valentine’s Day approaching, a listener admitted she was completely out of ideas. After being with her husband for a long time, she wondered whether men even expect anything on Valentine’s Day. Do they want gifts, cards, chocolate, or anything at all?
From Bobby’s perspective, Valentine’s Day has never really been designed for men. While he’s always appreciative of a gift, he doesn’t carry the same expectations that women often do around the holiday. Still, over time, expectations can form. In his case, his wife usually gives him a small, practical gift, like a shirt. Because it happens every year, Bobby admitted he’s come to expect something, not because he demands it, but because the pattern has been set. He added that he doesn’t care much about cards and can’t eat chocolate, but he does enjoy receiving a thoughtful gift. At the same time, he understands that expectations vary widely.
Amy said that some people value words of affirmation and handwritten notes, while others appreciate gifts that show time, effort, and thought. She said cards can matter deeply to certain people, especially when someone clearly takes the time to choose the right one. Reflecting on her own experiences, Amy shared an example from her dad, who always let the card do the talking. Her dad would spend time picking out the perfect card and simply sign his name, and that effort made it meaningful. Nothing that while she assumed her dad put thought into the process, the cards always landed just right, which made the gesture feel intentional.
In the end, Bobby offered a general rule of thumb. Men, he explained, usually don’t expect the same level of effort or extravagance they put into Valentine’s Day. But if someone is going out of their way to do something special, it’s nice to receive even a small gesture in return. His advice was simple: do a fraction of what your partner is doing for you, and it will likely be more than enough.